My Heart Still Beats

I’m sitting silently at home again with thoughts of you

Another night wasted worrying about what you could do.

Sometimes I forget you’re human—you have problems of your own.

But I’m vividly aware you are building a life that I’m not in;

I’m pathetically holding on to the only feelings I have ever known

Treating life like a chessboard, a game I’ll never win.

And when I hear one of those songs that remind me of you,

My heart stops, freezing me in memories of a better day,

One where I could say your name and you could say mine too.

Years pass but still thoughts of your heartbeat stays.

And while I don’t even have the words to say hello,

He greets you with a smile, a bitter twist to the knife.

Sometimes just seeing you makes me want to die—

I’m starting to think I’ll stay like this for my whole life.

         DannYetman

 http://www.yetmanpoetry.blogspot.com/

On a Night Like Tonight

It’s on nights like tonight I can’t help but think of you,

As I stare upon never changing ceiling tiles I wonder

Where are you from, where are you going?

What made you smile last, what causes tears?

Will you remember my name when you’re grown and gone?

The room spins and my eyes begin to grow weary,

I’m not even sure if I’m awake or asleep anymore

But I can’t help my continuing thoughts of you.

In a week you may forget me or perhaps it will take a month.

Perhaps in a year you’ll be gone forever or maybe it will take two.

My hands are shaking, my heart barely beating—I must be afraid

What am I afraid of? I’m afraid of you, always have been.

It seems that I only lose my voice when I want to speak the most

And it seems I want to speak when I’m close to you.

          DannYetman

http://yetmanpoetry.blogspot.com/ 

The Prince Is About

I search the shelves of my life for the book with a fairy tale ending,

So I can read it to you before you fall asleep—I’ll be the prince

And you can be the princess—can I have this dance?

Look at me, my drab clothing, eyes with nothing left

I’m no prince, I’m just Romeo and you’re my Juliet,

We all know how that story ends—you can be the poison

That ends my life and breaks my heart again.

Silver horse, hair past his chin, he’s out there your real prince charming

And I’ll be standing here when he comes, holding a bouquet of roses.

You’re gone for good, I know but what makes him royalty?

When the clock strikes midnight, why can’t you hold hands with me?

He gets the glass slipper, and I get a broom in a grocery store—

He gets to say goodnight and I’m left with another night I must forget.

Today it consumes me and tomorrow it will elude me,

I’ll be the one taking your coat while he’s the one taking your heart.

Why must I be a frog why you are clearly sleeping beauty?

Why must you be Cinderella while I’m just me?

       DannYetman
http://yetmanpoetry.blogspot.com/

My Bleeding Heart

Don’t let me sink; can’t you see the hurricane that’s in my heart?

It’s tearing me apart limb from limb, making me deaf and lame.

I see that look in your eye, you know, the look that I hate.

I’m still searching for the perfect verse, the one that makes you fall in love

So at the end of the night I won’t break my hands on walls,

Pictures of you going round and round deep inside my head

Bitterness gives me a shove, down the stairs—here we go again.

Isn’t it great finding someone so special, you can’t breathe at night?

Put them right up on a pedestal, oh wow, this girl must be the one.

There’s no better feeling then wanting to die when she’s gone,

Staring into her eyes and wondering what went wrong.

Break the mirror just to try to make your vision clearer,

Don’t smile back and stand strong, hold on to emotion,

Because you won’t be strong for long---hold back tears,

And don’t look back because you know what she is going to say,

Oh, by the way I still think you’re the nicest.

I need to know the name of that guy you’re dancing with,

When you glance at me the knife twists a little deeper, he makes me bitter.

And when I try to speak I hear my voice and I’m still me,

I got a heart but there’s a few holes in it as you can probably see

But if you listen closely you’ll hear it doesn’t beat but fractures

It will probably kill me someday when I’m left bleeding

Alone in a room somewhere, I’ll still be me but I’ll be smiling

Because deep inside my mind it’s you that I’ll be picturing.

I know how you’re feeling and yes you’d be right for thinking

Every screw must be lose, when I walk my head rattles

I hear your voice while dreaming, when I wake I feel like screaming,

I know life is not a game but if it was I would want to win every battle

So I go find a corner and try to look lonely but nobody’s coming—

Next I try running but there’s no search party here to find me

And I can feel it now, my heart being bled dry by your voice

This is my choice and it’s making me crazy, vision hazy—

I can’t sleep because at the end of the night, I’ll still be me.

The walls are telling me that It’s too late, I’m missed my chance—

I don’t know how to dance, but in all honesty neither can he.

By now you must think that I’m insane but I’m done with watching

I’m still searching for the perfect verse, the one that makes you fall in love

So at the end of the night I won’t break my hands on walls,

Pictures of you going round and round deep inside my head

Bitterness gives me a shove, down the stairs—here we go again.

      DannYetman
http://yetmanpoetry.blogspot.com/